Love Is In the Air

Relationships are carried out by very different rules here. I have been here for one and a half months now, and I have only seen a couple (guy and girl) holding hands in public TWICE. However, guys hold hands with other guys all the time [side note: homosexuality pretty much doesnt exist here. I saw a book in the UNIVERSITY BOOKSTORE about how to do an intervention and cure someone you love who is gay] and the same goes for girls.

I live in Volta Hall, an all-girls dorm (and the ladies of volta, who have bags and bags of both vision and style, are some of the most intense, motivated, well-dressed women I have ever seen in my entire life. No joke, and very intimidating sometimes) that will not let any men be inside from the hours of midnight to eight am. No exceptions, and anyone caught breaking the rules will get beat up by the security guards or the porters, and if you think I am joking, remember what they do to theives. So relationships here are very unlike those in America, where you sometimes find yourself in a relationship with someone before you really even know them, or else you are best friends forever, and then fall into love. Either way, there is a certain physical and emotional freedom that is allowed by our society. It is gauche to make out in public, but it happens all the time. And there is no body of authority figures in place at any university I have ever attended to maintain the virtue of their model female citizens. All of this makes for some very interesting phenomena. Like this:

My roommate Mikaela is pretty much going out with a guy from our program, and they spend tons of time together all the time. All day and sometimes all night. Last night he was leaving our dorm room to go to class at maybe six pm. She followed him out to kiss him goodbye, and one of our Ghanaian neighbors opened her door, saw them kissing, covered her eyes, and fled back into the sanctity of her room. Public afection is aparently a no-no here. (although the re-enactments of this small event went on long into the night) or this one:

In the evenings when I come home from class there are tons of guys hanging around Volta Hall. They lean against the railings, stand outside doors, or promenade around with their girls, sometimes holding hands but more often not. And they are everywhere. Later in the evenings, getting toward midnight, they all drift out of the entrance to Volta Hall, and sit on the steps in front talking to their girls, grabbing those last few precious minutes with them.

Relationships between men and women of my age here tend to follow old-fashioned rules of courtship. And it is quite touching in some ways. But it is still weird to see more guys holding hands with guys than with girls...

Oh, and there is a pretty good sized percentage of the Ghanaian male population that has two wives. Not a majority, but still a good chunk. Two wives.